I have never cared for electric can openers. They make a whole lot of noise and do a job in the same amount of time it takes me to open cans with a few twists of a handle.

I don't believe I have ever actually had one in my kitchen. Oh, I have purchased them. They just never get taken out of the box and used. I wind up giving them away.

Now this may seem random but one year ago this month I hurt my hand. I whopped it on something and it hurt like hell. Well, in the ensuing year I have had hell opening cans. I am ambidextrous so I figured I could use my left hand to open them and quickly realized it hurt, too.

I am also a writer who ONLY writes with my right hand thanks to my kindergarten teacher taping my left hand shut because the left hand is a "sign of the devil." It was 1970. I have always preferred to write by hand and then put it in the computer. It relaxes me. That hurts like hell right now, too.

Last Thursday I went to the ortho for my hand and was under the misguided impression it would require surgery and it would be fixed so when the doctor said it was Rheumatoid Arthritis I lost it. I was so not prepared.

I am certain that I completely freaked out my ortho because I have always been jocular and upbeat. When I left his office I called my Sissy (Euvah Bryant) bawling like a 2 year old.

I know it will be okay. But in the moment it felt like a death sentence. Stupid and an over-reaction but there you go.

I saw the electric can opener and computer keyboard as my future and it really hurt.

I am okay now and will buy the damn can opener on the first but man it really bites.